I’ve been listening to a lot of Tim Keller’s sermons. He talks about idolatry, and somehow I made it about sex.
I think I idolize sex and marriage. The reason I don’t have sex outside of marriage, if I look at my deepest intentions, isn’t so much that I have a firm belief in what the bible says about sex. It’s because I want sex inside the marriage to be good. And everyone knows, ya gotta save it till marriage for it to be the best(among Christian circles, at least. Sarcastic sentence here.)
I’m thinking ahead of the marriage I’m going to have, and I’m casting my idols on it. I’m saving myself not because I trust God and his design of sex, but because I want to have a good marriage and a good sex life inside it. I want to have a great marriage. It’ll fulfill me. It’ll finally fulfill my needs; my wife and I will have great sex, great marriage, and we’ll raise great kids.
All are good stuff. But idols usually are. The problem is that these good things don’t have their roots in what God’s commanded.
I’ll crush my wife with expectations this way. I won’t be able to love her truly. I’ll make her and our relationship (before it’s even started!) an idol. My kids will ultimately be a disappointment; they will not fulfill me.
I’m recognizing that I have idols everywhere.
God, help me to make you my one true love. Convict me of these idols, and yet help me not to be legalistic about them. Help me not be so calloused and indifferent. Mature me in the freedom of your love. May it burn within me to make you my one true love.
And I pray that I didn’t write this to holla at my Christian girls, cus that’d be lame. I just think this is a rather common hidden idol in the Christian culture, so I wrote publicly. Help me with pride.
Edit: I should note that the idolatrous desire to have a good marriage is rooted in fear. The fear of not having my idol, in this case marriage, sex, etc., drives my choices about sex today. But loving God as my one true love frees me from that fear and as a side result, goes to actually gratify what I was afraid to lose. Beholding God as my Lord empowers me to live a life that is good. Having him as my one true love is really the only way to live. Thank you God.